Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
