I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
Randomize