i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
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