She said her name was "party"
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
