I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
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