how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
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