so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
Randomize
