hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
You know what's awkward? Being with your girlfriend and seeing her ex-boyfriend that she left for you while you've got a Ron Burgundy level awkward boner.
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
Randomize
