Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
Randomize
