I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
