I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
Randomize