she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize