How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
I was in the bathroom and heard my brother scream "YOU FAIL!!!", and I swear to GOD, I thought my penis was yelling at me.
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
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