At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
Mom, I'm really sorry you saw my naked ex-boyfriend in the living room this morning. I can explain....but I'd rather just stick with this apology and be done with it
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
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