Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
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