Define "chronic" masturbator.
last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Randomize