I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
Randomize
