grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
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