For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
Randomize
