so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
21 Ladies Confess The Grossest Things They Do When No One’s Around
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
23 Tweets I Thought Were Really Funny When I Was Drunk Yesterday
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
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