Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
Randomize
