ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize
