at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
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