thus making me awesome and them whores
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
so after six weeks of dating she admitted shes bi and asked if it would freak me out if we brought another girl into the bedroom. i said no in this hesitant voice and she said 'if you let me dont worry ill make it up to you'
i literally fucking hate you so fucking much.
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
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