dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
You're breaking my sexual little heart
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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