i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
A Valium induced mom decided to walk into my bedroom this morning without knocking. Guess what I was doing? FML
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