Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
So I had a Liz Lemon moment today....went to Chipotle to get my "cheer me up" burrito bowl for the 4th time this week and the chipotle guy sighed and said always the same huh?
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
Maybe he injected his testicle?
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
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