she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
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soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
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That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
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