i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
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