Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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