Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
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