I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
I've discovered the best way to avoid rehab is to not fuck fat chicks when your drunk, therefore delaying regrets and rock bottom
your the Dr. Phil in my life
Today is an unchanging day
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
So here I am, sexting at work.
Randomize