Swine flu. Run for my life!
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
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