i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
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