I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
Randomize
