You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
I think I won the penis lottery.
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
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