Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
the liver wants what the liver wants
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
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