I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
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I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
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he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
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