he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
Randomize
