I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
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