when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
Randomize
