please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
Randomize
