I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
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