on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
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I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
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