No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
COCAINE IS GR8
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize
