Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
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