went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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