Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
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