i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
is wine microwaveable?
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
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