Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They don't have a Valentines Day card for the married guy I'm sleeping with. It can't use the words, love, soulmate, you're the only one for me...and obviously it can't be anything related to spending the day together because that's not happening.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
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