just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
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