So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
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