Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
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