Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
My plan for valentine's day: take a shot for every guy I've slept with. To keep me from going to the hospital I'm only doing half a shot for small dicks
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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